The family sat piled high on the sofa and chairs on Sunday morning at 6:00AM EST. There was a match that couldn’t be missed! England vs Spain. Fueled with mimosas for the adults and straight OJ for the kids, all eyes were glued to the television set. For a couple hours all the soccer world thought about was the spectacular work of these athletes and the calls the refs were making that we either agreed with or thought they were blind as bats. At the end of the game the focus was at first on Spain celebrating and England upset. I won’t bore you with the details you either already know or didn’t come here to be informed about. What I’m here to talk about is the moment after the victory was announced and the players began to react. That moment when we saw a player from Spain walk over and comfort the English player who was heartbroken.
You see, every player on that field gave it her all. Every one of them played to win. And at the end of the day, while only one team walked away with the trophy, it was still a win for every woman who plays sports. Every time people tune in to watch female sports it betters the opportunity for equal pay and equal treatment. And therein lies the reason I’m sharing this with you, dear readers. The teaching moment from this is this simple thing: all doulas thrive when other doulas get hired.
We want to attend births, but I- as an individual doula- am not right for every person, and none of us as a sole doula have the ability to serve every birther. We do, however, get our profession known to others when a family hires a doula. They talk to their friends and families about their experiences. That means that more people will be learning about what doulas do, and what they can provide for birthers and their families. So even if you don’t hire me after an interview, when I find out that you did hire someone, I’m excited for you! Even if I have availability on my calendar, I know that my doula friends benefit, and the effect in that birthing space means that all the doulas in the community benefit.
We work together as a community of doulas to bolster each other, to build relationships with families together, and to be there for each other in times of need. When I was running out of steam during a birth, one doula brought me a hot meal while another took over for two hours so I could eat and then nap. When a doula friend was running out of ideas on position changes, she texted me and I reached into my bag of tricks and made suggestions. When another doula needed some advice on dealing with a particular provider without it turning confrontational, she reached out to a doula who is spectacular at diplomacy. We worked together on these clients to get them their best birth scenarios, and funnily enough, our clients had interviewed some of us and decided our friend was a better fit. Their energy was better for that family, but we still were able to help out. All of this was done in service to the amazing birthing family, who had the entire community of doulas to support them by hiring one of us. And that makes us all winners.
DoulaWise 